My biggest creative outlet for my grief is writing my blog for one and poetry on occasion. I’ve also tried scrapbooking but I’ve only gotten a couple pages done. Maybe later I’ll work on that. I guess I’ll share a picture of my scap book and a couple poems I’ve written since the loss of my daughter.
“Nothing Left to Give”
Now, I’m barely sleeping I can’t close my eyes.
The memory of her won’t let me sleep tonight.
These empty arms are heavy and this puppy dog won’t do.
The only one who could fill them was taken far too soon.
I miss her tiny hands grasping my fingers tight.
I miss singing the lullabies that made everything alright.
I’ve lost the faith that we’d make it through hard times.
Now, I just don’t know how we’re going to survive.
How do we embrace tomorrow when fear is all we have?
How do we see the light when the dark is all that’s left?
They say that things get better but I don’t believe the lies,
How can things get better after your child dies?
When your heart is stolen and you lose the will too live?
When you gave it all you had until there was nothing left to give?
I’ve aged a thousand years
since you left my life,
The days have lost thier sunlight
I live the darkest night.
I’m trying to stay strong,
I’m afraid I’ll lose this fight.
You were the only thing
I had ever gotten right.
The time we had was not enough,
what do I do with all this love?
My heart it longs to hold you close,
to hear the words you never spoke.
To watch you blow my mind away
with all the things you learned each day.
Blowing bubbles in the tub
singing to you rub a dub.
All the little things I miss,
your attempts to give a kiss.
Rubbing your face against my breast, snuggled close but fighting rest.
Not a day will ever pass
that I don’t wish I had you back
You were my Reason, the light in the dark.
The one who stole away my heart.
You saved my soul and mended me
Taught me what a mom should be.
I wouldn’t surrender one moment we had
I love you more than I can comprehend.
I never thought we’d say goodbye
but life is full of tragic suprise.