I had to take a couple days off from the Capture Your Grief project, the closer it gets to November the harder it is. I’m just gonna try to play catchup and pretend today is actually the 11th day of the project. Grief is a very dark place but sometimes you find your “glow in the woods.” I have a couple, the biggest one is my best friend, Cassie. She was my good friend before I lost Reason but there was someone else I considered my very best friend, my daughter’s god mother, but she couldn’t handle who I became after I lost Reason, and I’m so lucky to have had Cassie when everyone else feel away.
She’s never lost a child herself but she’s so empathic and compassionate. She’s one of the only people I can call anytime and she’ll answer or call back. I can cry in the phone to her, talk to her about anything and everything, and she never judges only listens. She literally never says the wrong thing to me or tries to minimize my grief. She doesn’t get mad when I don’t answer messages because I’m so caught up in missing Reason and just don’t feel like talking at all. She’s passionate about making sure my daughter and the children like her our remembered. She actually reads and shares article about grief and tries to educate those around her. This coming Saturday she’s going to be walking in my home towns parade with loss families and my mom to remember and honor Pregnancy and infant Loss month. She’s also trying to get a support group for families affected by pregnancy and infant loss started. She’s passionate about loss families getting the help they need. She has the most beautiful soul. I love her so much because she loves me and my family unconditionally. She’s the only person who has been there for me so completely and hasn’t expected anything in return. She’s my glow in the woods and I wish everyone could have a friend like her.
Compassionate Friends is a great support group that helped me before we moved to Florida. Now I don’t have a support group because it cost too much to drive the over hour trip to a local chapter. I encourage any loss family that lives close to a chapter to attend those meetings. It’s a great place to talk to parents farther along in the journey and get the support needed.
There is a great online community for grief, so many parents on this terrible journey. I’ve become friends with fellow loss moms and its incredible to have a group to turn to in the darkest hours. Sometimes, it’s hard to see the glow in the woods, just keep walking, you’ll find it. The glow in the woods isn’t always tangible sometimes it’s Reason that’s my glow in the woods. When she sends me dreams, when I’m having the worst day and the thought of her makes me smile and I know I’m find a clearing in these impossibly dense woods.